Thank you for the pain. It made me raise my game.
I've just started reading a new book. At the front of the book on the dedication page, this authors' dedication is
"Thank you to my enemies. I couldn't have done it without you."
This kicked off a big discussion between me and my husband. That message really got to me. Why would someone thank people that have hurt them? People that have caused them suffering? Why would you do that?
But this message was profound. As my husband and I discussed it further we asked each other who were you before this happened? What were you like? What did this person teach you by behaving so terribly? What positive thing did you take from this situation- if any?
And sure enough, as we looked closer at things, we found many things, positive things, that came from those experiences. I'm not about to thank anyone that has hurt me. That just doesn't fit well with me. Looking back at how I've changed because of other peoples truly awful behaviour I can see it now.
I'm stronger inside myself. I'm less naive and trusting. I'm more confident. I'm better prepared to deal with awful people and their awful behaviour. My husband says the same thing.
Have a think about it yourself. What have your enemies taught you?